Nov 182014
 

Be completely honest with yourself. Forget about CFS for a moment (really!) and just concentrate on you.

What are those big, completely bonkers, unbelievably insane, but juicy goals you have for yourself? (Notice I’m using ‘have’, not ‘had’)

dream

Image taken from here

Do you think that it’s all over because you’re ill? Have you given up on it? If so, why? (Please don’t say, “Because I’ve got CFS”!) Are you letting your illness pull you down?

You rule CFS, CFS does not rule you.

You know this and you’ve known it since the first day you were diagnosed.

What if your big dream and visualising it is the thing that helps you recover? Is it still looking so terrible? Can you see it in your mind’s eye and imagine yourself in that image?

Dream big, dream bold. Be brave, be bold. Be strong, outrageous, honest, loving and brimming full to enthusiasm.

Your dream is here- I can see it. Everyone around you can see it…and it’s yours. 

…But where are you? What’s stopping you?

Step up and take the route to healing by loving your illness. Sign up to my FREE 4Week Transformation Project, starting soon!

You deserve this- the world needs your dream. Pop the bubble of fear.

In love and fearlessness,

Katie   xx

Nov 082014
 

 

Sometimes, I was so determined to beat this terrible illness that all I did was think about it. I would think about it morning, noon and night (when I wasn’t sleeping, that is!)

I know you want to heal now, instantly, and one of the things that’s so difficult to accept with this whole thing is the longevity of it. When is it going to end? How will it end? Will I wake up one morning and suddenly feel instantly better? It used to drive me absolutely crazy.

selfLoveFortune

Photo taken from here

All I ask of you today, is to take this minute, this hour or this day as a day of healing.

Ask yourself, what do I need today to make me feel better and begin to heal CFS? Even if I wake up tomorrow morning and I’m having a bad day, what I can do for myself today that’ll really make me happy and that I’ll remember tomorrow? What does my body need? What does my spirit need? What does your gut tell you? (Don’t ignore it!)

It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money or use up lots of your energy, but taking time out to find the little joys and pleasures in life and acting on these impulses can make the difference between a bad day and great day. Give all your energy to whatever little pleasure you have, and do not feel guilty about it for a second- you deserve this and you are really honouring yourself through it. Be present and enjoy. If you’re eating chocolate for example, think about the texture, colour and smell of it, as well as the taste. You’ll find your enjoyment rockets to a whole new level!

Here are a few suggestions:

If you honour and care for yourself regularly and every day, even in a small way, you will really start to see the benefits. This will set you up to form amazing healing habits for your recovery and beyond.

How would you find pleasure in this second, this minute, this hour or this day? Comment below!

Love and time-out,

Katie    xx

Nov 052014
 
forgiveness

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.”- Mark Twain

violetPhotograph taken from here

If you read and follow blogs which are similar to mine or if you read spiritual books or texts, you will know that ‘forgiveness’ is a bit of a buzz-word right now. Some people might think they understand forgiveness, but when I really thought about it and took it on for myself, I think my healing sped up dramatically and made me look at things in a different way after practising forgiveness. ‘Forgiveness’ definitely deserves its buzz-word identity, but it often incredibly difficult to know exactly how to forgive.

How many times has somebody you know held a grudge against someone for a really stupid reason? “She didn’t bring me a present when we had our housewarming party”, “He said he’d take my son to football, but he never offered to”, “She told me she’d phone me, but she forgot”. Little resentments like this build up over time. When they happen they can be seemingly inconsequential- you can brush them off and put it down to them having a busy day. When you find yourself feeling irritated by the person however, recognise this feeling and know that it is hindering you moving forward, creating hidden negativity, but it is more importantly a huge energy zapper.

When I was first diagnosed, I lost touch with a lot of my friends- partly because I was too tired to make the effort, but mostly because I was embarrassed and didn’t know how to explain things to them. I then started thinking things like, “If she’d ever been real friend, she would’ve phoned me” and “He didn’t even get in touch when he came home from Uni- he must have known I wanted to him to visit me”. Resentment then built up and I felt completely alone, like all the friendships and years I’d had with them meant absolutely nothing.

After I’d let them go however and moved on with my life, I knew that I had to clear any negative thoughts about them and with it, any malice or resentment I was feeling. How were they to know how ill I was if I hadn’t told them? How were they to really understand what was going on when even I didn’t know?

Forgiveness was my opportunity to release the past, bless my family and friends and move on. More importantly, it was a chance to forgive myself, for being so selfish and thinking of my own needs all the time, for feeling jealous and resenting my friends and, more importantly, for being ill.

Your illness is NOT your creation or your fault. You can forgive all the people who’ve ever wronged you constantly for the rest of your life, but if you can’t forgive yourself, you can’t move on or heal.

Once I’d forgiven myself for thinking negatively and for feeling bitter towards my family and friends, my healing rapidly sped up…and I mean, rapidly. I gave myself a week to really work on myself. A week of meditating, writing down the names of anyone who’d ever done anything wrong or negative towards me but not examining the ‘whys’, a week of blessing these people, thanking them for the lessons I’d learned from them, forgiving them out loud and moving on. After a week, I felt lighter and freer, and almost saw the world for the first time all over again.

The one thing I learned in all of this though, is that self-forgiveness is incredibly healing. It is also very humbling and will make you feel utterly vulnerable, uncomfortable and completely out of your comfort zone. REmember that this is all part of the process though. Don’t just forgive people as a fly-away comment- you have to really mean it and live it. Feel the parts of you where resentment is hiding. Talk to it, thank it and let it go. It isn’t going to serve your healing or your future life- it’s time to love it and leave it. Feel the weight lift from you and pause for a while to embrace this new you. The ‘you’ you knew was there, but always seemed to be in hiding, the ‘you’ before your illness.

forgivenessPicture taken from here

Love the ‘old’ new, love the ‘new’ you. Cherish your family and friends, and all that you’ve learned from them.

Forgive yourself.

Love and forgiveness,

Katie      xx

Nov 012014
 

As well as accepting my illness, for me, asking for and more importantly, receiving help from others was incredibly difficult. I realised very quickly that not only did I not know how to ask for help, I also didn’t know how to accept help from others. There are several members of my family who are not just a little bit stubborn, but almost infamous for it! I didn’t think I was one of those people until I became ill with CFS when it showed up in a major way.

As you’ve probably got to know by now if you’ve been following my blog, I pride myself on being independent and doing things my own way. I’ve always been a little bit quirky and don’t tend to follow the crowd (this isn’t a deliberate choice, it just seems to happen that way!). Having to drop out of Uni in your first year and move back in with your parents after a CFS diagnosis is one way in which the universe made sure that from then on, I would have to collaborate and eventually ask for help from other people. I learned recently however that once you learn to do this, and receive help fully and graciously, there is a sense of power and amazing collaboration which appears…

…and my god, does it feel good.

The key in the early stages of any illness is recognising the ways in which people try and help you (more on this here). When I first moved home, I thought my parents were nagging the life out of me and really didn’t understand me. In hindsight however, this was their way of caring for me and making sure that my illness didn’t completely take over what was supposed to be a prime time in my life. After their loving care and injections of positivity, I attended Uni a year later and managed to complete my four-year course with a year in France to boot. I honestly believe that if they hadn’t helped me in this particular way, I may not have been able to attend Uni at all. They knew I was independent and stubborn, so basically forced their help on me. I wasn’t very good at being grateful at the time, but now I hope they know how grateful I am to them and I hope I can repay this gratitude through my actions in years to come.

Asking for help from someone in itself, especially in our world today, is a great sign of strength and character. By asking for help, you are admitting that you are vulnerable and need assistance, and there is great beauty in vulnerability. I would say that when you ask for help, 99% of the time the other person is grateful to be of service and to assist in whatever it is you are going through, be it asking when your bus is due, asking a neighbour to mind your cat for the weekend or asking for advice with a difficult personal problem. I take it as a compliment when people ask me for directions in the street- I must appear to be kind and approachable. I can’t always help them, but I am incredibly grateful to be asked.

brene

Picture of Brené Brown at TED taken from here

Receiving help is an art-form in itself, and one which I think the world needs more of. There is a quiet power in receiving help. We are one, we are all connected, so receiving help not only benefits you in the short term, but it creates a ripple effect. Your friend then asks someone else for help, then they ask their neighbour, and it continues. Decide whether you need help or whether you can truly and honestly take the responsibility on your own. As soon as you decide to ask for help, the butterflies in your stomach will tell you that you are moving out of your comfort zone and into this ripple effect, enabling you to receive graciously.

I feel strong and vulnerable when I ask for help, as it was a foreign concept to me for quite a while. Babies and children never fail to ask for help and receive it with love, and we should learn from them as adults. We grow and stand a little bit taller every time we do, the world appears brighter and people smile that little bit more often.

What do you need help with today? Ask with love and feel that little bit more grounded when you receive their assistant. We are one big community, full of ripples, and it feel gorgeous.

(For a little bit more on the concept of vulnerability, please sit back and watch this amazing TED talk by academic, speaker and writer, Brené Brown. I absolutely love this video and think being vulnerable is a humbling and inspirational attitude to have)

Love and vulnerability,

Katie   xx

Oct 282014
 
joy

It’s hard to believe that you can have any fun at all when you’re ill and recovering. I remember lying in bed for hours on end thinking about all the fun other people were having without me, people with more energy and vitality than me, people who didn’t have to think about illness for a second while they were enjoying themselves.

Then I realised that my definition of ‘fun’ was all wrong. To me (and maybe to society), the epitome of fun was raucous party scenes and dancing until the early hours. I’ve never been much of party-goer, but always felt when I was growing up that this is what I should be doing- stumbling home drunk at whatever time in the morning and not being able to remember anything, because this is what my friends were doing.

Feeling comfortable with what you like to do and searching for your definition of fun can often take some time. Your definition of fun might not be the same as someone else’s and this is great- find your joy! You’re often under pressure from others and conform just so you feel like you belong. This includes going places when you don’t have the energy or feeling forced to do something because someone is telling you to snap out of it.

fun

Write a list of things you like to do.  I consider all these things fun, however geeky and strange they might sound. This is what makes me unique and I love myself for it:

How To Remember The Fun In Life

Writing to you lovely people
Reading spiritual books
Oprah’s amazing programme, Super Soul Sunday
Going to bed early / having a lie-in, and not feeling guilty or bad about it
Studying Energy Medicine
Listening to birds singing in the morning
Anything involving bright colours and stripes
Juices and smoothies
Raw chocolate
Chia seed puddings
Singing
Stumbling my way through yoga 
Writing letters and cards to people (on paper and sending them in an envelope!)
Talking with someone and really connecting with them
Someone really confiding in you
Angel cards
Danish crime dramas (I know!) and Foreign Films
Laughter and comedy
Reading in French and German
Anything to do with France and all things Paris
Breaking down sentences into grammatical points (I know, I need help!)
Batman
Men’s brown leather brogues made for girls and old-school satchels
Big jewellery
Chatting with a friend for hours on Facetime or on the phone
Sushi / anything Japanese
Going out of my comfort zone and being me

joyPicture taken from here- notice the bright colours! Fun!

This is a slightly unconventional list, but remember life is for living and being joyous. Love what you love and love it unashamedly. You can create fun from the smallest thing if you get pleasure from doing it and it brightens up your day.

Where can you find fun in your day today? Write a fun list and post it below or on Facebook! Can’t wait to see what you’ve written!

Love and joy,

Katie   xx

Sep 262014
 
marilyn

 

Come back to this page when you’re lost, when you’re wondering what it’s all about. When you’re fed up to the back teeth and are struggling to find your ‘other way’. When you need to feel the comfort in words and feel your spirit bounce when you’ve found the right ones. When you need a little bit of CFS help…

You’ve probably seen that the world has gone a little bit crazy with these quotes, but I love to let myself be inspired, even swept away by them on a regular basis (See ‘Words to Live By’ board on Pinterest, if you don’t believe me!). Although it’s easy to get lost in a sea of these images, when you find a good quote, it really makes you stop and think.

It doesn’t matter if you have CFS or not- we all need this from time to time. Let’s bring in the light, bring in your spirit….

Love and a river of words,

Katie  xx

give up

courage

afrid

marilyn

wounds

sails

big things

einstein

and my favourite….

stars

 

 

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If you enjoyed these inspirational quotes, there are plenty more in my (FREE!) e-book! Click the green book image at the top of the page or below for instant access!

A little book of quotes and inspiration for the journey

May 182014
 

Before your illness, before all the pain, all the waiting, all the ‘why me?’s. Before the embarrassment, before the humiliation, before the loss…what were you tired of? I mean really, really tired of?

Sit and cast your mind back. Meditate and think truthfully, deeply.

What were you really, really tired of feeling back then?

Useless? Worn out? Like you weren’t getting a break? Like you had no time to yourself? That you didn’t deserve to rest? That life was against you? That no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t change your situation? Powerless? Defeated? Trying incredibly hard to please others, but forgetting about yourself? Like you weren’t your true self?

dog

Picture taken from here

Think about your attitude to life, to others and to yourself before CFS.

Click here to read about what I was tired of in my life before becoming sick.

:ove and honesty,

Katie    xx

Jun 172013
 

I am jumping up and down excited today to bring you this amazing, amazing interview. I’ve been keeping this one under wraps for a while, but it’s finally time to share it with you.

Hayley Carr is a 9 x World Champion Martial Artist, Life, Health and Confidence Expert, who is passionate about helping people get the best out of themselves, and genuinely enjoy their life. Through her Live Peak Performance Workshops, Personal Coaching and Online TV show, she delivers world-class information to help people all around the world gain confidence, clarity and control, in a way that is unique, fun, and life-changing.

…and the best part? Hayley has fully recovery from CFS and kicked it right between the eyes. Retaining World Champion Martial Arts titles after CFS? Done. Living life fearlessly and seeing life as an ever-expanding journey? Done. Going after what she wants and not being afraid to get there? Done. Inspiring others to be the best they can possibly be? Done?

When Hayley sent this interview through to me, I had to read it through about six times- it’s so incredibly insightful and packed full of inspiration. It knocked the wind right out of me. Whether or not you have CFS, please share this with your nearest and dearest- you will definitely learn something new about yourself illness and your life in the words that follow. Hayley proves that when it comes to your health and your life, you are in the driving seat. Let me know what you take away from this- I’d love to hear from you.

Without much further ado, ladies and gentlemen, may I present the  beautiful fire-cracker that is Miss Hayley Carr.

smaller face

“You are here for a reason. This period of your life is temporary, and the lessons you get from learning how to heal yourself will serve you for the rest of your life. That is worth fighting for.” – Hayley Carr

Guest Interview with Hayley Carr

1) Describe yourself in three words.

Adventurous, Grateful, self-fulfilling. =)

 

2)  What inspired you to create your website and business?

After suffering Chronic fatigue for so long, (or what felt like so long, when I thought I just had a flu and would be out for only a week!) and learning so many lessons that healed me along the way, I was so grateful to be able to use my body and function again.

I saw so many people who wanted help to do the same thing, and felt compelled to help them, but even more, I saw so many people who had no idea that their life was just… “bleh”… for lack of a better word. They weren’t enjoying themselves, weren’t necessarily doing anything about changing it, and had no idea that they could. They thought it was just how life was – mediocre. This made me really fired up!

During my time having Chronic Fatigue, I studied a modality called NLP. (Neuro-Linguistic Programming), which changed my entire view on life, and how our unconscious thought patterns affect the outcome of our lives. It totally blew me away and I can’t NOT share the information now, if you know what I mean!

 

3)  I know that you too suffered from CFS for 2 years. How did you feel during that time? What was going in on your life before you became ill?

Chronic fatigue was such an interesting experience. In fact, you might think I’m crazy, but looking back now, it was the best experience of my life. It taught me so much about myself that I’ll never forget because it was so significant, and so intense.

Before I became ill, I was burning a candle that had many ends, at all ends. =)

It took 5 years of “signs” from my body before it finally went, “OK Hayles, you’re not listening, ***shut down mode!”

At the time I got sick, I had just quit my part-time job in an Architecture studio where I worked full-time hours, I was studying full-time at university, which required an all-nighter once a week to complete the work that was required, and I was training for World Karate Titles every night until roughly 2 or 3am. On the weekends, I was partying hard with my friends because I was so fearful of “missing out” and I felt like it was the only way I could relax, and in-between I survived off coffee and the odd sandwich or steak when time allowed. My life was a clusterf*ck of social events, and aspiring to accomplish things, which spiralled me further downward until my body said, “no more, babe!”.

During the time I was ill, I had no idea why. My life was like I said above, not great, but I had no idea how to change it or even if I could. I thought this was just how it was going to have to be if I was going to get to do everything I wanted. I felt Horrible! Like I was stuck in a drugged-out state and could not see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I was quite angry and depressed because of this too. All the doctors I saw, except one, told me that basically, I was going to have to get used to life being a little crappy. I’d never really be able to work properly again, or make money, or train karate, or really do anything like a normal person… geeeez imagine if I had listened!

 

4)  What was the thing that really accelerated your healing? (Any juicy tips?!)

It definitely wasn’t just one thing, but using everything in combination was the key. Without writing you an essay here, I’d say my top 5 are:

1. Self-love.

Cultivating the act of deeply accepting yourself, right in this moment – warts and all. Treat your body like a vehicle, and your mind that hates your body, like the challenger to be “shooshed!”. The only way to make changes is by first accepting the situation and finding peace and gratitude within it.

 2. Finding a supportive environment.

Find your tribe. Again, this can be done in combination with all the other steps, but once you find your peeps, you have more energy. They support you, uplift you, hold you accountable, and will catch you when you fall too. Sometimes this means doing a total friend-detox!

3. Listening to your intuition and your body.

Your body knows the answer to all of your big questions long before your brain does. This is why we get sick. This is why we get skin issues, or headaches. Your body is telling you something, and if you listen, you can respond and make the “problem” go away. Same with your intuition. It doesn’t always make sense though, and that’s OK.

Recognise the difference between what you need and what you want, and Do what your body is asking you to do. This is what you need. For example, sometimes, what you want is to go out and see your friends, but what you need is to chill out and enjoy your own company, relaxing for the night. Other times, what you want is to stay home and hide under the blankets and be cranky, but what you need, is to go out and be social. When you understand when your body is telling you what you need to do, you don’t need to think any more =)

4. Back Yourself.

Set goals and protect them like they are your little babies and you’re a mumma bear! If someone is saying things that don’t quite match up with where you want to go, you don’t have to listen. I give you permission right now to tell them to “shove it” if you need to. That sounds harsh, I know, but on this journey of healing, remember, only YOU know your body, NOBODY else. Everyone is different. What works for some, won’t work for all. It gets me so fired up that doctors tell people that there is no cure to this mystery illness, when clearly there is. Follow your gut. This is the same with your goals, too.

5. Never ever ever EVER give up.

I remember in the very early days of my being sick, my Chiropractor said to me, “Hayley, when this is over, you will look back and see it as the best experience of your life, for what it will teach you”… I thought she was nuts.

She was right.

You are here for a reason. This period of your life is temporary, and the lessons you get from learning how to heal yourself will serve you for the rest of your life. That is worth fighting for.

 

5)  You’ve also won 9 Karate World Titles (Yep, you read right my lovelies! Wow!) – how in the world did you get to that stage from CFS?!

I have competed in world competitions every 2 years since I was 14, sometimes multiple divisions and multiple tournaments, so it was only the 9th that was after my CFS.

To be honest, I feel better than I ever have since I healed my body, so I came back stronger than I had ever been. I had to deal with the blow to my ego of not being able to compete in one of the world tournaments early on when dealing with my illness, and I was still very sick 6 months before the last one I competed in.

At first, I could only do 5 minutes of the 2 hour class. I’d then sit down and go to sleep up the back. So I started amping up everything I was doing to get well. For example, I was having 2 teaspoons of greens, I started having 2 teaspoons, 5 times per day. Absolutely smashing my body with nutrients. I meditated twice daily, went for walks outside even when I was tired just to clear my head, I started having colonics, and I only put the best nutrients I could afford into my body. I got really strict, but it’s important that you know it wasn’t from a place of fear, it was because I believed I deserved to get well.

It was more of a mental challenge though. I had a really hard time dealing with being hit in the face when I came back to training. For some reason, whenever anyone came near my face I’d break down into uncontrollable sobbing – it was so embarrassing! – but I had to learn to be extremely patient with myself, and accept that this was where I was. My ego was going wild, comparing me to everyone else I was training with, and how good they were getting, and how “crap” I was compared to when I stopped training… that doesn’t help.

I made getting better my sole purpose. I made bargains with the universe, and every day I asked myself, “where can I get energy from?”, as opposed to my previous mantra, “why am I so darn tired? When is this going to end?”. It was commitment and a sacrifice, and I told myself I’d be grateful just to be able to compete again, and I think it was coming from this place of non-resistance that I was able to heal much faster.

small kick

 

6)  How do you make sure you recover from intense physical exercise?

The best advice I have ever been given around recovery, is that “no is a full sentence”.

In the past during times of intense physical training in preparation for a tournament, I’d still do everything I’d normally do, and then some. I’d still go out drinking and partying just as much as before, still agree to late nights and early mornings, all the social events, and despite being exhausted, I thought it was better to sacrifice my body to do all these things and not miss out on “having a life”.

But the life I was living was not the life I really wanted to live, it was more of circumstance, and what I thought I “should” be doing.

Nowadays, I don’t feel like I am ever missing out. When you come from a place of self-love, and acceptance of where you are in your journey, in your training and otherwise, rather than a fear of not being good enough, you can easily say no to things that don’t align with you and your goals.

The best recovery is rest when you need it. Above all else. It’s OK to say no, and you never have to justify why.

 

7)  Do you ever think about your past history of CFS? How do you focus on the present and the future?

By asking myself every day these 3 questions,

  1. Where can I get more energy from right now? (sometimes, the answer is rest, sometimes, the answer is to go out and move your body.). This keeps me in the moment,
  2. What’s next for me in my life? (This helps me cultivate a positive visualisation of the future)
  3. What is the next logical step to get there? (This helps me take action)
  4. And for one bonus, what am I grateful for right now? (This helps you see the beauty in all that has passed.)

 (Seriously, how amazing is this lady?! Wow! – Katie    xx)

8)  What are your non-negotiables when it comes to your health?

Affirming my boundaries, and having ‘me-time’.

In my work, I get to help people all day, and I absolutely love it. I see a lot of people doing work like me however, and not enjoying it, because they feel like they have to hustle hard and sell their soul for cash. For my health, and for yours, I can’t run my business when it runs me, and I am not asserting my boundaries as to when and how I will work.

It’s the same with sleep. My boyfriend used to need far less sleep than me, and would go to bed really late at night. I used to go to bed when he did, so I could hang out with him, and, (again) not miss out. Sometimes that meant that I would only get 5 or 6 hours per night, which made me consistently exhausted.

When I am feeling energetic and alive, everyone benefits.

Me-time is the second non-negotiable. When I have some time to myself every day, I feel grounded, and sane again. I really notice when I haven’t had it for a while, so now, it’s a non-negotiable. Sometimes that means it has to be 5 minutes of meditation on the loo, other times its a few hours laying on the grass in a park, or writing at a cafe.

If you know what your non-negotiables are, you know the key to living the good life. The next step is to actually make sure you include them in your day!

 

9)  How has fear appeared in your life and what do you do when it does?

Oh yeaaaah I love this question.

I used to be afraid of fear. Literally. It wasn’t the fear itself that was a problem, as much as the fact that I was afraid. (An ego thing, I guess!)

I used to avoid being afraid of things, because it really annoyed me when I couldn’t do something.

Now, I love when I experience fear. Not the creepy guy down the dark alleyway kinda fear, I mean the fear that makes you feel like you’d be the biggest legend on earth if you could overcome it.

I believe the things we fear are our unique, individual challenges that we are born to overcome. Why else would we all be afraid of different things?

Once we overcome these fears, we realise there was nothing to be afraid of in the first place, perhaps it was even a matter of being focused on the wrong thing!

I have spent the last 5 years busting my own fears, and helping others bust theirs, and I can honestly say from experience, that every time you bust through a fear, you have exactly the same experience in your body. The first time you do it, it’s hard. Every time after that, you can see the pattern repeating itself, and although the fear doesn’t always subside by simply observing it, it becomes a lot less significant, and more part of a system.

When you recognise where you are in the system, it’s exciting because you know where you’re going!

10)  What do you do or say to yourself if you’re having an ‘off’ day?

I have worked really hard to re-frame how I think about “off-days” now. Here’s how I see it:

I don’t have “off” days any more. I used to say I was “having an off day” all the time, and honestly, some days you do feel like sh*t, and everything goes wrong, but when you cultivate a positive mindset that everything is going to be OK, and it’s just working out with a different outcome to how you planned, you realise there is no such thing as an “off” day. It’s just that you have forgotten it’s all fine, and you’re here right now.

One of the elements for change in the unconscious mind is the conversation we have with ourselves. When people used to ask me how I was, I’d say, “Yeah, I’m OK, I’m really tired, I’ve been sick, I have Chronic Fatigue… etc”. One day I started answering that question by saying, “I’m getting better every day” and it became very much like an affirmation to me. My Mantra. As soon as I heard the words come out of my mouth, even if I was feeling really tired, It felt better.

So, in answer to your question, on days where I feel like the proverbial has hit the fan, I take a deep breath, and have a little pep-talk with myself. “It’s all good Hayley, you’re OK. You’re safe”, and then I go back and ask myself the 4 questions from above.

 

11)  What projects are you working on at the moment?

At the moment, I have a number of projects going. I’m playing solo-traveller and experiencing working with location-independence, which is a dream come true! Right now, as I’m typing, I’m in Havana, in Cuba, and tomorrow, I’m headed to Mexico, where I’ll be finishing my new website.

In July this year I will be running a live workshop in Peak Performance in Sydney, where I teach people everything they need to start living as the biggest expression of themselves, and bust through fears. Afterwards, I will be focusing on turning this into an online, video-based training so the information can be accessed by more people in more places.

 

12)  Any other words of support and encouragement to share with my readers.

You are amazing. Stay focused on what you want, and never let anything get in the way. You can be as unrealistic as you like, as long as you are willing to give yourself the time, and the love to achieve it. You are supported, and you are safe to take care of yourself. I’m sending you all my love and support… =)

xoxo

Hayley’s Website  //  Facebook  //  Twitter  //  YouTube

small face

May 142013
 
summit

 

Hay House World Summit

I’m so, so excited to introduce this amazing *FREE* online programme to you courtesy of the fantastic,  well-renowned publisher of life-changing books, Hay House.

Hay House and its authors have formed a huge part of my healing- in fact I’d say they were the ones who expanded my mind and kick-started my healing journey. I realised after reading many of these books that healing was in my hands and that it had been mine all along. Reading these books, following these authors and doing the work got me to where I am today, and I’m so excited to help you start healing CFS with these amazing authors.

The Hay House World Summit, which is delivered completely online and is COMPLETELY FREE OF CHARGE (woohoo!), starts on June 1st and features many of my favourite authors:

  • Louise Hay (Louise wrote the first spiritual book I ever read, ‘You Can Heal Your Life’)
  • Dr. Wayne Dyer
  • Caroline Myss
  • Doreen Virtue
  • Marianne Williamson
  • Deepak Chopra
  • Esther Hicks (Abraham Hicks)
  • Anita Moorjani
  • Cheryl Richardson
  • Jack Canfield
  • Kris Carr
  • Christiane Northrup, M.D
  • Don Miguel Ruiz
  • Lissa Rankin, M.D
  • Mastin Kipp
  • Robert Holden
  • Suze Orman
  • Bruce Lipton
  • Iyanla Vanzant (will definitely be tuning in for this one- this lady is on fire!)
  • Gabrielle Bernstein
  • Sonia Choquette
  • Neale Donald Walsch

…and many more (yep, I’ve a read A LOT of books- don’t say I didn’t warn you!)

Hay House World Summit

All you have to do to register is click on one of the banners on this page and type in your email address- it’s that simple! You’ll be given direct access to 6 exclusive pre-summit online videos. If you’ve never come across these authors or have never picked up a ‘self-help’ or spiritual book, these videos are great introductions.

I’ll be commenting on the findings of the talks as we go through the programme, but I really, really hope for your health and bright, shiny future that you’ll join me in watching, listening and learning from these amazing speakers from June 1st.

It’s completely free and I know you’re going to learn something…it might even change your life (like it did mine!)!

Love and Hay House healing,

Katie   xx

Hay House World Summit

May 132013
 

 

Woohoo! I’m so, so pleased to welcome another beautiful, inspirational special guest to the blog this week. This lady is beautiful, passionate and believe that everyone can have the health and vitality they want and deserve. I was slightly flabbergasted when I finished reading this interview- these words are so heartfelt and revolutionary, I was speechless!

Welcome to Conquering Fear Spiritually, Claire Obeid from The Wellness Project!

claire

Claire is a Holistic Health Coach and Yoga Teacher. I know some of you are absolutely dying to know about CFS, nutrition and exercise, so in this interview, Claire answers all your questions on this and more. I absolutely love Claire’s evident passion for wellness- you can feel it running out of every word she writes. I don’t really want to to much more, as this interview’s so, so good and I want to pass you straight over to Claire and her amazing words of wisdom. (The phrase ‘Wise beyond her years’ springs to mind!)

Thank you so much to Claire for taking the time to answer some questions for us and for giving such comprehensive answers.

Enjoy my lovelies!

Katie     xxx

 

1)    What was the inspiration behind your wellness journey?

It wasn’t so much an inspiration rather an epiphany that whacked me over the head.

In my late teens/early 20s you could say I lead a pretty destructive lifestyle. Around 22 I’d started to have an inkling that something wasn’t quite right. I was choosing to stay in and read, instead of party. ‘Quiet and Slow’ had become my new way of living.

Not long after my first Iyengar yoga class literally cracked me wide open. I spent the class with hot, wet tears rolling down my face as I dealt with physical pain and emotional release. It was in this moment that I realized something had to give.. IBS, adrenal fatigue, OCD, anxiety – they’d all found a home in me. I knew then in that yoga class I had to make a change

From there, every spare moment and spare dollar went towards yoga. I was googling yoga sequences at work and researching retreats.

At each step I started to feel more open, lighter, aware… happy, if I dare say.

Yoga then led me to review how I was feeding my body. I started to experience stillness in mind and a stronger body but I was still grappling with health issues. The more I played with and tweaked my diet the stronger and more balanced I felt.

Today, I am STILL on my wellness journey, or in the midst of my wellness project, as I like to see it. I am forever a student of wellness. Experiencing life, reviewing it, driving forward, sitting with it, opening up, embracing challenges, finding new ways, refining and retuning. It’s ongoing, and I love it that way. Wellness is a journey into yourself – to your true essence – and I adore feeling connected in that way.

 

2)    What are your non-negotiables when it comes to your health

Firstly it’s what works for my body (or yours). Non-negotiables have to be tried and tested to know if they are right for you. My must-haves are good, clean, WHOLESOME food. If it’s not real, it’s not on. Lots of filtered water. Lots of good fats – I am all for fat and the traditional way of eating. Green veggies – as many as I can handle in one day!

Yoga, breathwork + meditation. Daily movement and quietening of the mind are by the far the most valuable part of my wellness regime.

 

3)    How has fear appeared in your life and what do you do when it does?

We all have limiting beliefs ingrained in us from such a young age. I still have fears and insecurities, the difference is I SEE them for what they are now. I am aware when they crop up, I know they aren’t the ‘real’ me – but an ego-based reflection. Fear creeps into my life when I’m not trusting the universe and myself. I might start to question my place in the world and what I’m here for. Or I might start comparing myself to others.

First, I let myself feel the fear and then I move forward.

I used to fight it – a lot – and I was left with an ectopic heartbeat and a serious case of anxiety and OCD

I find that I need to move towards fear. Shake its hand, say hello, sit down with and say ‘so… what’s up?’. I acknowledge it and then, thankfully, it starts to dissipate, it becomes watered down and almost ‘silly’. When I ignore it and turn my back to it, it grows bigger and bolder and manifest into almost every part of my life. This takes repetition, practice, willingness

If I’m feeling truly overwhelmed and I need to reign it in it’s here that I usually practice EFT (check out my video on what this is and how to do it! http://thewellnessproject.net.au/2013/04/30/why-you-should-try-tapping-for-health/) or meditation.

Yoga gets me out of my head and drops me back into my heart and my body. Getting outside – sunshine, nature, earth beneath my feet – this reconnects me to something bigger and greater than my fears. And journaling – I’ve always been a writer, so the written word is very therapeutic to me. It’s cleansing to brain-dump.

 

4)    What do you do or say to yourself if you’re having and off’ day?

I let myself have an off-day. I be OK with it. I say “Claire, it’s cool – you are human and you are having an OFF day “I then look into my heart, drop the story around my ‘off day’ and try and tune into what I need.
Drop my tools and leave work alone for a day? Yoga? A walk? A big green smoothie. Cry into a pillow? Laugh with friends. Dance?

I let it unfold.

 

5)    You produce and publish some amazing, fresh and health recipes on your blog. What foods should we be incorporating into our diet to encourage healing and sustain our energy?

Thank you!

Keep it real. That’s my rule. Keep it simple and fresh. Have a predominantly plant based diet.

  • Lots of Dark green leafy veggies. Lots of veggies full stop. They should be your best friend.
  • If you eat meat – grass fed and pastured produce only. Be mindful of the source.
  • Eggs are an amazing source of protein – I eat at least 6 a week.
  • LOTS of good fat, especially if you’re a woman – fatty fish, coconut oil, real butter, avocados, nuts.
  • Hydrate – don’t go mental, but at least 1.5 litres per day
  • Reduce the sugar – even fruit. Preferably live a sugar-free life.
  • Good sources of grains – brown rice is so incredibly healing but make sure its biodynamic and local
  • Superfoods are fantastic as supplements but if you are low in cash don’t fret, real food is just as good, if not better. Superfoods are ‘add-ons’ they should be your bulk
  • Probiotic foods – yoghurt and kefir are always in my fridge. If you are lactose intolerant go for coconut or goats/sheep’s milk based options

claire yoga

dog

6)    You’re a yoga teacher as well as being an inspirational health coach- is there a place for yoga as part of a healing process? Do you have any gentle yoga postures that people with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome can adopt? 

There is such a HUGE place for yoga in healing. I started my healing process because of yoga. In fact, I’ve decided to incorporate more yoga into my Holistic Health Coaching practice.

I have had clients suffering from Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia and all have incorporated yoga into their daily routine.

The key with Chronic Fatigue sufferers is to adopt a gentle ‘slowly-slowly’ approach. Yoga is such a special practice because it can be harnessed for the individual and their needs. It’s not a one-size-fits-all.

Balancing yogic breathing techniques are invaluable as are gentle.

Supported forward bends like pachimottanasana (seated) and uttanasana (standing) balance and calm the nervous system.

A supported downward facing dog (using blocks and bolsters) is key to increase blood flow, frees tension in the upper back and gently builds energy and reclining restorative postures like Supta Buddha Konasana (bound angle pose) over bolsters increases flow and circulation to the adrenals, thyroid and kidneys which store a lot of energy.

 

7)    Describe yourself in three words.

Authentic. Passionate. Positive.

And a few more for good measure: Intuitive, present, loving, open and honest!

It’s hard in only three!

(I love this- Claire walks her talk alright!) 

 

8)    What projects are you working on at the moment? 

Oooh – so many! I’m working on my first ever eBook. It’s all about learning how to surrender and let go of all the ‘stuff’ that holds us back or the situations we can’t control so that we can literally STEP into the life we want. I think Chronic Fatigue Sufferers would have a lot of experience in the challenge of surrender.

My own journey is peppered with countless challenges in surrender. All of which I am so grateful for, because I feel better equipped to help myself and help others embrace the art of letting go.

I’m also planning a new online offering based around yoga and wellness which I CANNOT wait to get off the ground.

On a smaller scale I’m going deeper into my video blogs and will be posting up little yoga how-tos and sequences to share this amazing practice.

 

9)    Any other words of support and encouragement to share with my readers.

You a spiritual being enjoying a human existence. Embrace your story as a human being to an extent. Our body and how it functions is so important to how we exist day-to-day. But also willingly unattach a little from the body. You are more than just your body and it’s ailments. It’s important to not identify too much with the physical realm… even though it’s what binds you to this earth. You have layer upon layer – from the physical, material, spiritual, emotional, mental and energetic. You can lead the most fulfilling life WITH what you have. You can take what you have and make it better! You can make changes that nurture and support you, you can embrace the beauty of acceptance and you can also love the life you are in – with all its flaws.

Health and wellness is individual – it’s totally unique for each person… the recipe is different. This is exciting news because you get to own your wellness – branded under your name. Embrace it, wear it with pride and make it truly special. When you are ready to grow and evolve it’ll still carry your unique stamp and it’ll give you exactly what you need, when you need it. All you have to do is want more for yourself because you truly believe that it’s your birth right to live a balanced, happy and healthy life in mind, body and spirit!

claire 2

 

Connect with Claire

Website  //  Blog  //  Facebook  //  Twitter 

 

 

Apr 292013
 

 

Lots of my mentoring clients have said that CFS is ultimately quite boring. Man, I hear you!

I know the state of being sick is boring in itself, but what bugs me more is the name, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.

It sounds miserable, it feels miserable and sometimes, let’s be honest, it is miserable.

fireworks

Photo taken from here

But what if we injected a bit of fun into it! (Errrmmmm, what?!)

How about instead of CFS standing for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, we make it stand for something else?

Reframing Chronic Fatigue Syndrome

Conquering Fear Spiritually

* Celebrating Feeling Spectacular

* Crying From Spirit

Comforting Fabulous Striving

* Cheering Fantastic Sparkles (yey! ♥)

* Creating Fairy-Tale Stories (ok, slight cheat with this one!)

Clearing Frightening States

Collecting Faith Supreme

Contemplate Flourishing Sensationally

CFS isn’t look quite so terrible now, is it?! Have fun with these lovely acronyms- they might just brighten up your day! What ideas did you think of?

Love and Creating Fabulous Steps,

Katie   xx

Apr 092013
 

Hi everyone! This is just a short post to mark the historic arrival of two important milestones in Conquering Fear Spiritually’s history! Yahoo!

Firstly, you’ll probably notice if you’ve made it this far(!) that the website has been changed a little bit to make it more readable and it therefore allows me to help you through those rocky patches and beautiful patches. I really hope you enjoy the new look and the new website! Yehoooo!

Screen Shot 2013-04-09 at 9.26.01 AM

Secondly, (*big gulp!*), I finally got around to something I’ve been thinking about for a while- putting up a video blog. I know that lots of people out there can’t read for long periods of time, especially on computer screens and many people just prefer listening to things, so I thought I’d have a go! Please let me know if this is something you’d be interested in watching more of in the future- I’ll try and keep them short, I promise!

chronic fatigue video youtube

Enjoy my darlings- have a beautiful day!

Love and vlogs, Katie    xx

Mar 272013
 
lighthouse

I don’t know about you, but I never felt there was a day- a single day – during being ill in bed where I relaxed completely, where I felt myself say, “Stuff it, I’m going to enjoy this”. How are you supposed to enjoy it? It’s never-ending, you’re in pain and nothing really seems to be getting any better.

Remember those days off you had when you’d have a bad cold or the flu, even when you were younger? The day was completely devoted to YOU and what you and your body needed to get its strength up again. You felt snotty and disgusting, but you were curled up, watching your favourite DVD, drinking hot tea or soup and even in your sucky state, a bit of you relaxes, because you know that that’s the only thing you can do right now.

Why can’t we be as kind to ourselves with CFS? I couldn’t- I was terrible at it. I used to try and do jobs around the house or try and tidy things up, so I felt as if I was ‘doing’ something. I’d read only to feel like I was having ‘too much fun’, then would feel guilty about it. Ultimately, what happened? You guessed it- I woke up the next morning feeling worse than the previous morning. My muscles ached and my throat was sore, but more importantly, I was mentally exhausted. I felt emotionally drained and not fit for action at all.

My emotions were affecting everything and slowing down my recovery. Why do we burden ourselves with guilt, shame, fear, disappointment and hopelessness when our body is in recovery mode and needs our emotional help? Who are we helping by doing this? Certainly not ourselves.

You owe it to yourself during your illness to relax and enjoy your recovery time. It’s not selfish to take time out and focus on yourself. You can only fully help others when you help yourself. Don’t fight it- work with it, and your healing will be much quicker. You’ll even come to expect healing.

  • Run yourself a bath and stay in there until your fingers look like prunes.
  • Watch that movie that your partner can’t stand, but you think it’s the best thing you’ve ever seen.
  • Put some lipstick on, even though your hair’s a mess and you’re still in your PJs.
  • Drink your green juices and smoothies in a wine glass.
  • Meditate for 5 minutes.
  • Flick through your favourite trashy magazine.
  • Write a letter to yourself or a friend.
  • Play Beyonce as loud as it can go and work it.

It’s your day- even if you’re ill in bed, don’t waste it for second. Even if you only have half an hour to yourself before the kids come home, use it and love it. Be messy, be greedy, be joyful, be fabulous, be selfish. It’s your time- have fun with it. If you have a whole day, declare a Healing Day and pamper yourself guilt-free. If you have a week or a month, even better- you deserve it.

I’m heading away for the long Easter weekend with my fiancé and some friends to Byron Bay, an amazing place by the beach just south of Brisbane, Australia. I’ve already got massages and lovely things planned for when we get there, beautiful vegan food courtesy of the Conscious Cafe and music and laughter courtesy of the legendary Byron Bay Blues Festival. I’ve declared this to be 4 days of healing, laughter, sun and treating myself, which we all need from time to time…and I’m going to go for it!

lighthousePhoto of Byron Bay Lighthouse taken from here

byronPhoto of Byron Bay at sunrise taken from here

Can you dedicate some time to your healing today or this weekend without feeling guilt or shame? Can you declare this a month of healing? I’d love to know what you did and how you felt afterwards. I’ll share some pictures and an account of my 4 days away next week!

Have a beautiful long weekend everyone!

Love and me-time,

Katie     xxx